The Biggest and Best Decision I'll Ever Make

I grew up going to church almost every Sunday.  When I was in high school, I helped my mom teach Sunday School.  In college, I lived the life that almost every college student lives...get through school Monday-Thursday, and party Thursday-Saturday (and all that comes with it).  I thought I was a Christian.  After all, I was a good person, I grew up in church, and I knew about Jesus.

The summers before my Junior and Senior years in college, I went on a humanitarian-type missions trip to the Appalachian mountains to help impoverished families fix up their homes.  I thought that I was making my steps toward Heaven.  Little did I know that not only is there no "stairway to Heaven," but I was also not a Christian (Ephesians 2:1-10, Gal 2:15-17, James 2:19).

On the missions trip to Appalachia that I attended the summer before my senior year, God gripped my heart with the reality that there was so much more to life than what I was living.  I made a decision on that trip, that when I returned to ECU, I would volunteer somewhere and serve in some way.  As I started my senior year, I felt compelled to start going to a campus ministry meeting.  I went to one, but never went back because I was taking a Spanish class at night that ended right before the ministry started.  I felt like it was too much.  So, I started seeking out volunteer opportunites.  But, the Volunteer Orientations were at the same time that I was in class.  So, I decided to just forget about it...it just wasn't meant to be

One night, as I left my job on campus, I walked through a group on the mall holding a carnival.  Carrie, one of the girls that lived on my hall my Freshman year was there, and she stopped me.  She persistently asked me to come to a campus ministry meeting the next week.  I told her that I would, and left, thinking that even though I really didn't want to go, I had to honor my word.

So, the next week, I was sitting in my apartment waiting on a friend to call me and tell me about what was going on that night (it was Thursday night, after all).  It was the same night that I had promised to attend the campus ministry meeting.  I didn't want to go, and almost stayed home...but something compelled me to go.

When I got to the meeting, I realized that it was much smaller than the one that I had attended earlier.  As the music started, I started to get really uncomfortable.  I had grown up in a traditional church that sang hymns...this music that they were playing was wierd.  Not only that, but people had their hands raised and their eyes closed.  Some were clapping.  All I could think about was how embarrassed I would be if one of my friends walked by and saw me in there.  I wanted to leave, but I didn't want to be rude to Carrie, so I stayed.

In the middle of one of the songs, I heard God's voice for the first time saying, "Why can't you praise My name?"  At that point, I broke.  I tried to control my weeping, but couldn't at all.   I found myself so ashamed about the fact that I was too embarrassed to sing to God.  To make matters worse, even after the songs ended, I continued to weep.  During the sermon, Carrie asked me if I wanted to talk afterwards.  So, after the service was over, I sat down with the campus minister and Carrie.

They shared the gospel with me, and it was as if I had never heard it before.  They were talking about how Jesus loved me and desired to have a relationship with me.  The only way that I could come into a relationship with Him was if I repented of my sin and turned to God.  When they asked me if I wanted to make Jesus the Lord of my life and to come into relationship with Him, I told them that I didn't want to accept Christ because I was worried about what my friends would think...yes, I know, I was STILL worried about that...even after God had supernaturally stepped into my world and had chosen to speak to me!


But, needless to say, by the end of our conversation, I had recognized the reality that if I didn't accept Him into my life that day, it meant that I was rejecting Him and all that He accompished for me on the cross.  So, I repented and came into a relationship with Christ that night. 

Because of my decision to follow Christ and my desire to please Him, I stopped doing the things that God wasn't pleased with.  I did lose almost every single one of the friends that I had, because I was no longer partying like I used to, but I gained so much more than I ever imagined possible.  I went from an extremely shy and insecure girl to a woman that has found her security and identity in Christ. 

Jesus is just as alive today as He was 2000 years ago, before His crucifixion.  He has changed me, and He can do the same for anyone else out there that is willing to allow Him to become Lord of their life.  In the 10 years that I've been a Christian, I have found myself amazed by the power and love of God as He has moved in my life and in others' lives around me.  He is a good, faithful, amazing, loving Father that still today heals the sick, gives sight to the blind, raises the dead, makes people whole, and cares about you and your situation!